Fill Me Up
A seemingly endless interior for seemingly endless loads.
PMDG released their latest 777 variant for Microsoft Flight Simulator.
Of course it’s also the sexiest 777 variant: the freighter.
Thick fuselage unobstructed by distracting windows.
Slender wings terminating in beautifully raked tips.
Massive engines producing colossal thrust.
It’s the full package. A big package. A big beautiful plane.
And that enormous cargo hold? Makes me shiver. A seemingly endless interior for seemingly endless loads.
Keep filling it up - the 777 freighter is unphased. “I might be full, but I want to get stuffed” aviation’s Himeros thinks aloud.
Drag Race
What is a wing for, if not drag?
We’re all born naked and the rest is drag.
That’s right, RuPaul. We come into the world a blank canvas and everything else is of our own construction. Drag can be a way to explore that canvas through performance art that exaggerates gender expression.
Drag is also an aerodynamic force that opposes an airplane’s motion through the air. And while we’re usually fighting it with increasingly powerful engines and efficient airfoils, it’s also what gets us back on the ground and brings the airplane to a safe stop so we can keep living our lives and filling our canvases and creating ourselves.
So which plane does it best?
Good luck, and don’t fuck it up.
DHL 727
She’s sleek, she’s sexy, she’s yellow, and she’s dirty. Look at those massive flaps and how they contrast against those little spoilers. DHL 727 isn’t afraid to exaggerate where it matters, oil drops glistening in the sun as she brings her precious cargo to a halt.
American A310
Thick, tall, and glimmering. She’s loud and expressive, unashamed of uneven surfaces and wrinkles. She serves timeless beauty. A paragon of graceful aging. Slowing down in a way that makes you cry out “please, speed up again!”
Qatar A320
A demure body that immediately draws your gaze to flaps falling in perfect proportion to sleek spoilers rising up and revealing their inner machinations, together hollowing out the structure as if to say “what is a wing for, if not drag?” Lord help us.
Ansett F28
She’s different, she’s unapologetic, and she’s letting it all out. Multi-stage flaps and five spoiler panels per wing. A complete transformation as the speed brake opens. It straddles the line between art and obscenity. Ansett F28 is serving shameless and we’re here for it.
British 777
Beauty and power. She’s been doing this for a while and it shows. Her efficient wings unfurl with such grace that my eyes glaze over and I lose focus, until I hear the world’s most powerful engines throw thrust in reverse, reminding me that this diva is bringing over 500,000 pounds to a smooth stop. It’s almost too much to handle.
My Willy in Alaska
Suddenly I’m sitting in a cockpit in Alaska, listening to the birds tweet as a silver fox walks by…
“Try out the Wilga. It’s Polish but also English.”
I’m not quite sure what that means but my interest is piqued.
Suddenly I’m sitting in a cockpit in Alaska, listening to the birds tweet as a silver fox walks by and butterflies flutter past rustling leaves in the late afternoon sun.
The entire experience is gorgeous.
I fly around a bit, then realize the airplane is a Polish manufacture and it’s the cockpit text that’s in English.
That’s a bummer. I was hoping for someone - or something, I mean - a little more exotic.
777: Transcendent. 787: Toy
The 787 is a toy. And the 777 is humanity’s magnum opus.
There are a few types of people in the world: those who are strong, those who are intelligent, and those who who believe Boeing’s 787 is a better aircraft than the 777.
Let’s cut to the chase: the 787 is a toy. And the 777 is humanity’s magnum opus.
The 777 is significant. It is iconic. It conveys a sense of strength and wonder with its notable length and sizable girth (3-4-3 economy seating). It was the first aircraft Boeing developed entirely with computer-aided design (CAD), and their first plane that didn’t require an expensive full-sized physical mockup. Beautiful and cost-conscious.
The 787 on the other hand is flimsy, its wings arching on takeoff in manner that can only be discerned as flaccid.
It was several years behind schedule. Suppliers from around the world rallied behind the airframe, building wings and fuselage sections abroad and delivering them on Boeing’s Dreamlifter to the Everett factory for final assembly - except they didn’t even line up. Everything required rework. The first airframes off the line were so overweight airlines didn’t want them. A globalization debacle. And what is that nose?
And those windows: toyishly large and completely unrefined. They make the airplane look akin to a toddler’s Fischer-Price plaything. They are but one issue among many that point to a common theme: the 787 was designed to look futuristic but didn’t quite hit the mark. It will age terribly.
On the other hand, the 777 is timeless. It has aged gracefully and will continue to do so, its light brown cockpit a fine whiskey contrasting the 787’s grey sludge interior.
And the 787’s GEnx and Trent 1000 engines? Fuel efficient, perhaps. But the 777’s GE90-115B transcends, sucking air through its 135” diameter fan blades and delivering 115,000 lbs of thrust each.
The 777 is bold and powerful. Incomparable and stunning. A sistine chapel.
A tantalizing pleasure.
A substitute for pornography.
SECS: A Guide to Taking Exceptional Flight Sim Screenshots
Master the Setting, Environment, Composition, and Story to get drool-worthy flight sim screenshots.
Master the Setting, Environment, Composition, and Story to get drool-worthy flight sim screenshots.
Setting
Whether your airplane is fueling up at a busy gate, mid-cruise on a transatlantic voyage, or touching down at a remote airstrip, the setting is the first step to building your scene. On the ground or in the air, there are some key aspects to consider.
On the ground
Take advantage of the scenery without letting it be a detriment. A busy gate at a custom airport can be an exciting, engaging setting, especially with airport vehicles and workers abound. If aiming for realism though, take care not to get too close to any single object. Your airplane may look amazing but a low poly fuel truck could break the immersion and have you questioning why you recently spent $1,200 on a new graphics card.
In the air
Takeoff, climb, cruise, descent, and landing all offer unique opportunities to take beautiful screenshots. Each however also offers unique risks. On takeoff and landing, consider visual fidelity of the runway, airport, and surrounding scenery. During climb and descent, ground texture and photogrammetry quality become paramount. Cruise is the opposite, where detailed ground visuals matter less from 35,000 feet, but overall intrigue can easily diminish.
For both, also consider the airplane’s configuration. Are the flaps or landing gear deployed? What about the various lights? Are you showcasing a particular livery? Would the plane think, “I am beautiful”? The way the airplane looks and presents is key to establishing its presence within the setting.
Environment
Each part of SECS is important, but if there’s one that has the most potential to dramatically uplift the scene, it’s the environment. Here we focus on sunlight, time of day, and clouds.
Sunlight and time of day
The sun’s angle and position relative to your plane will have a massive impact on the overall scene. Everything from the shine of the aircraft to the reflections on its surface, from the shadows that fall across its body to the colors of the sky above, is affected by the sunlight. As the clock progresses minute by minute the changes can be dramatic.
Airport lighting will be off one minute and on the next. Be cognizant of what you want when picking the time.
Early morning, mid day, and late afternoon and beyond will all affect the overall tone of the sky and the length of shadows across the airplane and the scene.
The sun’s location relative to the aircraft’s position will affect the plane’s reflectivity, the sheen along the fuselage and wings, and the overall glow. Positioning the aircraft, whether its direction of travel or bank angle, will also impact how it appears within a set scene. A front versus backlit scene, and the extent of each, all play a role in the overall look. The exact same plane and setting can look mind numbingly drab or positively hot depending on these factors.
Clouds
The clouds define a scene as they dance with the sunlight - a spicy tango with a worldwide audience. Play with multiple cloud layers, individually changing coverage and density, while also adjusting the sun’s position, and watch as they feed off one another. See as the sun embraces one and shies away from another, as the rays stretch their fingers and caress each smooth surface, as a tension builds between them, a moment of perfection arrives and a climax of colors bursts upon the screen.
The airplane’s location relative to the sun and the clouds will affect how well it is lit and open the door to intense scenes.
Adding cloud layers and adjusting their altitudes will have a significant impact on lighting and shadows, without any other changes.
Cloud coverage and density affect how much and how clearly the earth is visible, which can give context to altitude and overall weather conditions.
Composition
Framing, focal length, and focus. A thrilling threesome where everyone leaves satisfied assuming practice and balance (likely MMF, possibly MMM). The key is moving around, trying different positions, messing around until suddenly it all feels right.
Framing
The rule of thirds is frequently recommended for lining up your shots. And it works well. But don’t be afraid to go off grid and do something different.
The angle of your shot is an extremely powerful tool to play with. In Microsoft Flight Sim, consider using the drone cam to force a certain perspective.
As an example, if the shot were taken by “an airport worker with their cell phone,” get the camera close to the ground (but not quite ground level) and rotate up a bit. Suddenly you feel like you’re there and the ramp supervisor is asking what the fuck you’re doing.
Perhaps you’re getting a shot up high that would be difficult or impossible to capture in real life. Your options are endless, and playing with the perspective can convey, for instance, a sense of immense size and power. “Look at this big beautiful plane.”
Slight camera adjustments to improve overall contrast can also elevate the image. The position of the aircraft, for instance, relative to the buildings or clouds around it, will determine whether the plane gets lost in the scene or sticks out.
Focal length
Microsoft calls this zoom level, and it does much more than just getting you close. In other words, using zoom is not the same as translating forward. Zooming in (simulating a longer focal length) will compress the background and change the perceived shape of the plane compared to a shot simply taken with less zoom from closer up (wide angle).
Focus
There’s nothing wrong with leaving the focus on auto or fixed to infinity so everything in the scene is crisp. But focus can also be a simple way to draw your viewer’s attention, often with beautiful and downright dreamy results (“Yes I’m on a tropical island but look at my abs”). Play around with drone focus on Microsoft Flight Sim or F-number and focus distance on X-Plane 12 (where you have even more control) until you’re thoroughly satisfied. Then keep going if you can handle it.
Story
Feeling. Emotion. Narrative. What story are you telling and how should the viewer feel? Are you evoking a hint of desire, a pinch of envy, a dash of drama? Or perhaps it’s strength you’re conveying - a dominating mindset, or one of being dominated.
Unlike setting, environment, and composition, there are no hard and fast suggestions here. You might express an entire sentiment in one image, or perhaps you deliver it shot by shot, drop by drop, until you’re entirely depleted but a magic is born.
Often it’s a combination of setting, environment, and composition that lend emotion to an image. But it’s important to be intentional, to drive your narrative and own the whole of your parts.
Parting Thoughts
Setting, environment, composition, story. Pick a place, perfect the lighting, get in frame, and be emotional. SECS is a framework to help you take remarkable flight sim screenshots. Have fun with it, and eventually you’ll get that shot that really sends you over the edge.
Three Beach Looks for this Flight Sim Summer
Show off those legs and soak up the sun.
Summer is here and it’s time to hit the beach. Whether swimming in the water or soaking up the sun, here are three looks that might suit you.
Bold. Sexy. All American. With Bulge.
If the 747 is your plane of choice, you’ve got to rock the Speedo. You’ll be visible. You’ll be seen. You’ll be iconic. The 747 wows crowds around the world with its distinct front end and so will you. It’s a lot to handle though, so make sure you’re ready.
Sleek. Sunkissed. Hot. Versatile.
The 737-700 is perfect. And so are some bright white pool shorts with 5” inseam (not to be confused with the -800 variant and 7” inseam). Show off those legs and soak up the sun. Maybe head into Mongibello for dinner. Just don’t get onto a rowboat with your new friend Tom Ripley.
Free. Airy. Light. A little confused.
A glider is your calling. And you value comfort and self discovery above all else. Bring a linen shirt to the beach and you’re ready for the day, and what comes after. You’re soaring freely through life, you’re unconcerned with what others think, and you may just wake up in bed with your best friend and a woman you both desire.
Fouga Magister: Boys Night in Naples
It feels bad saying no to Ben. It also feels good saying yes.
“We’ve got to fly something cool tonight. Something foreign. Italian. The Fouga Magister.”
Ben’s an enthusiastic guy. Charming too. But above all, interesting. Not really sure what he does day to day. He once told me he had spent two weeks fishing in the South China Sea. A few months later he was chartering hot air balloons in Cappadocia. Whether these are hobbies, jobs, or both, is unclear.
I get a text asking if I want to jump into flight sim tonight. It feels bad saying no to Ben. It also feels good saying yes. So I say yes. And he insists that we fly something cool, exotic, different. A jet. Specifically Italian.
“Buy the Fouga Magister. It’s really cool. And it’s on sale. God, it’s amazing.”
So I do. That’s a rave review. It’s all I need. I’m easily convinced. I have no impulse control.
Ben tells me he’s already loaded up in Naples. I’m searching for Naples on the map. Which one? Obviously not Florida. Okay there we go - the one in Italy. I load in.
Ben picked bad weather. Not low visibility, or rain, or high winds. Bad weather as in I want Microsoft Flight Sim to look good and Ben picked clear blue skies. Pretty boring, honestly. We spend 15 minutes getting the time and weather adjusted to something a little prettier. Looks do matter.
He takes off. I take off. The jet handles nicely and it’s fun to fly. And it looks awesome. We’re zooming around at 350 knots. Fine Italian speed.
Time to slow down and try some formation flying. I’ll let Ben do the work while I fly level. Properly trimmed it’s not that hard. Ben getting into formation on the other hand is a different matter.
“Get behind me. A bit higher. No not that high. Okay try lower. Speed up a bit. Shit can you slow down?”
We’re finally in formation. We get a slight bank in there. I get some stellar shots.
It’s late. Ben probably has to wake up early tomorrow to pour concrete. I want to check out the new X-Plane beta. So it’s time to land and we spend the next ten minutes trying to find each other while simultaneously navigating to some airport nearby that Ben keeps mentioning but I have yet to see by eye or on a map.
He crashes into the water. I pretend to do a water landing. The simulator tells me that I crashed, too.
I google “Fouga Magister.” It’s not even Italian.
Fucking Ben.
How the PMDG 777 Cost Me $500
I’ll just get my big beautiful payware plane fix somewhere else.
We all heard that two weeks to two months nonsense that came and went but that’s old news. Timelines slip. Whatever.
But I like planes. Airliners in particular. The big ones. The beautiful ones. Big beautiful planes. They remind me of trips abroad growing up. They bring me back to getting Expert Software’s “Big Jets” back around 1998, only realizing upon trying to install that it was an add-on for Microsoft’s FS98. Yup that’s right. My first Flight Sim purchase was a payware add-on.
I didn’t know what I was doing. I wasn’t even 10. My parents and I went back to the store and got FS98, and we eventually installed “Big Jets” too (had to wait a while because who gets two presents unprompted at once?).
So I love big airplanes and payware runs through my veins. Someone get me a high fidelity 747-300 (with Thai Airways livery, I beg you).
Naturally, seeing that the PMDG 777 was around the corner had me in a heightened state of being, glowing like that perfect tan just before the burn. Learning that it wouldn’t come as soon as anticipated… well, whatever, I’ll just get my big beautiful payware plane fix somewhere else.
Queue X-Plane. Apparently there are some big airliners on there and Microsoft Flight Sim can’t compete. I’m a sucker for graphics but they don’t look too bad. Guess I’ll try it out. $80.
“You have to get the Toils A340-600. It’s so good. Best long haul. So, so good. Literally the best.”
You had me at you have to get. I’ll do it. I need it. $90.
“You like 747s? The modern ones are so basic. Have you heard of Felis? He’s this guy in Ukraine who has single handedly built the greatest 747-200, maybe even add-on, for Flight Sim, ever.”
Please. Say no more. I need it. I want it so bad. $70.
I fly them both. They’re gorgeous. They’re stunning. I can’t get over how much better big airliners are to me. I almost can’t forgive myself for not diving into the latest X-Plane sooner. Default graphics can’t touch Microsoft Flight Sim but does it matter when you’re an 800,000 pound behemoth at full thrust barreling down the runway on a flight from IAD to JFK because who actually has time to fly to Tokyo?
“The Rotate MD-11 though. A trijet—”
Yes, yes, I know. I’ll get it. It’s big. It’s beautiful. I like big beautiful planes. $84.
Should I get a few really nice airports? I think I should. $90.
At this point you think I’m bad at math because that isn’t $500. And that’s true; it’s just over $400. But what I failed to mention is that when I first heard of the PMDG 777’s impending release, I picked up VKB’s STECS throttle for a cool $340 shipped. So we’re at $754.
So I am bad at math. Or at least at mentally adding smaller amounts to a larger sum. I’m a marketer’s dream.
More Fokkers Please
I want to pretend it’s the 1980s. I know nothing about the 1980s.
Keeping it short and sweet.
I want more of these little Fokkers in Flight Sim.
I want to hear every little tick and click.
I want to watch the manual gauges go in circles.
I want to fly VOR to VOR and keep oscillating because I’m bad at it.
I want to pretend it’s the 1980s.
I know nothing about the 1980s.