Drag Race
We’re all born naked and the rest is drag.
That’s right, RuPaul. We come into the world a blank canvas and everything else is of our own construction. Drag can be a way to explore that canvas through performance art that exaggerates gender expression.
Drag is also an aerodynamic force that opposes an airplane’s motion through the air. And while we’re usually fighting it with increasingly powerful engines and efficient airfoils, it’s also what gets us back on the ground and brings the airplane to a safe stop so we can keep living our lives and filling our canvases and creating ourselves.
So which plane does it best?
Good luck, and don’t fuck it up.
DHL 727
She’s sleek, she’s sexy, she’s yellow, and she’s dirty. Look at those massive flaps and how they contrast against those little spoilers. DHL 727 isn’t afraid to exaggerate where it matters, oil drops glistening in the sun as she brings her precious cargo to a halt.
American A310
Thick, tall, and glimmering. She’s loud and expressive, unashamed of uneven surfaces and wrinkles. She serves timeless beauty. A paragon of graceful aging. Slowing down in a way that makes you cry out “please, speed up again!”
Qatar A320
A demure body that immediately draws your gaze to flaps falling in perfect proportion to sleek spoilers rising up and revealing their inner machinations, together hollowing out the structure as if to say “what is a wing for, if not drag?” Lord help us.
Ansett F28
She’s different, she’s unapologetic, and she’s letting it all out. Multi-stage flaps and five spoiler panels per wing. A complete transformation as the speed brake opens. It straddles the line between art and obscenity. Ansett F28 is serving shameless and we’re here for it.
British 777
Beauty and power. She’s been doing this for a while and it shows. Her efficient wings unfurl with such grace that my eyes glaze over and I lose focus, until I hear the world’s most powerful engines throw thrust in reverse, reminding me that this diva is bringing over 500,000 pounds to a smooth stop. It’s almost too much to handle.